Star of Bethlehem vs Sweet Chestnut
Star of Bethlehem is numb. Sweet Chestnut is anguished. Both follow something hard, and the difference is whether you can feel it.
Star of Bethlehem
Shock and grief, whether it happened this morning or years ago
Sweet Chestnut
Anguish at the end of your endurance, when it feels as though there is nothing left
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Why they get muddled
Both sit at the heavier end of Bach's despondency group, and both describe somebody outwardly still functioning. Neither is likely to be talked about much at the time.
The differences
What you feel
Star of Bethlehem
Not much. Dazed, flat, slightly outside yourself.
Sweet Chestnut
Everything. It is anguish rather than numbness.
What it follows
Star of Bethlehem
A specific event. It might be this morning or it might be years ago.
Sweet Chestnut
A long stretch with no relief, rather than one identifiable blow.
What you would say
Star of Bethlehem
I should be more upset than I am.
Sweet Chestnut
I cannot take any more of this.
What helps
Star of Bethlehem
Time and thawing. Nothing needs to be forced.
Sweet Chestnut
Company, and knowing it does pass.
Which one to pick
Choose Star of Bethlehem if
- Something has happened and you feel numb rather than upset
- There is an old event you still cannot talk about
- A particular date or anniversary knocks you flat each year
Choose Sweet Chestnut if
- You feel you have reached the absolute limit of what you can bear
- You are functioning outwardly while struggling badly inside
- You have been through a long stretch with no relief
What if both sound right?
A shock that never healed, followed by a long hard stretch on top of it, is a common story, and both remedies belong in the mix when that is the story. Whatever is happening, lean on somebody you trust while you take them.
Common questions
Does Star of Bethlehem work on old grief?
It is traditionally used for shock whether it happened this morning or thirty years ago, and the old ones are what most people reach for it for. There is no time limit on it in the tradition.
Is Sweet Chestnut the same as despair?
It is the traditional description for the extremity itself, the point at which it feels as though there is nothing left. Gorse is flatter and more resigned. Sweet Chestnut has the anguish in it, and it is a companion for the worst of it.
Keep narrowing
The pairs closest to this one, if neither of these two turns out to be it.
GorsevsSweet Chestnut
Gorse is calm about it and Sweet Chestnut is not. Both feel like the end of the line, but one has settled into resignation and the other is still inside the worst of it.
HoneysucklevsStar of Bethlehem
Star of Bethlehem is for the moment it happened. Honeysuckle is for the years afterwards, when the past keeps getting more of your attention than the present does.
MimulusvsRock Rose
Mimulus is for fear you can live alongside. Rock Rose is for the moments fear takes the controls. If your body got there before your mind did, that is Rock Rose.
AspenvsRock Rose
Aspen hums and Rock Rose shouts. If the feeling is a background unease you have been carrying all week, that is Aspen. If it seized you and you are still shaking, that is Rock Rose.
Still not sure?
Read both profiles in full, or start from the feeling and let the quiz narrow it for you.